+ The Beaver is printed on 100% rec>'cle o Academic Freedom Professors call for unrestricted academic freedom Halls Security Special investigative feature on security at LSE residences Erik Ringmar Academic complains to LSE claiming freedom of speech was denied Bankside House room burgled; Vo!iinmiiig and pait4iine students xxm T&xive discount on tuition fees; Middle East Centre to be opened LSE at forefront of growing national debate on government policy towards languages Rajan Patel Senior Reporter Nick Byrne, Director of the LSE Language Centre, is at the forefront of the growing debate over the teaching of foreign languages in British schools. Byrne was the lead signatory of an open letter to the Observer newspaper, published on 3 December, in which 50 leading academics expressed concern over the decline in the number of students taking GCSEs in modem languages. The letter, which was also sent to the Department for Education and Skills, called for an end to the government policy of allowing students to drop languages at the age of 14. Since the introduction of the policy in 2004, the studying of languages in schools has sharply decreased, with the most popular language at GCSE level, French, declining by over 25 per cent. The debate has received significant national media attention, with Byrne most significantly appearing on BBC Radio Four's Today programme, debating language provision in schools with Baroness Estelle Morris, the former Secretary of State for Education and Skills. Speaking to The Beaver, Byrne explained that while the introduction of the ptograph: Liam Chambers The LSE is one of many leading universities which have expressed concern over government policy Government's 2004 policy was accompanied by a new focus on language teaching at the primary school level, this focus has been undermined by the consequences of allowing students to drop languages before their GCSEs. "Teachers were saying, 'We don't have to do languages any more, we can make cutbacks,"' Byrne said. "Students can find languages difficult to get a good grade in, so a lot of schools were very glad to get rid of it. If you remove it, you move yourself up the league tables." Byrne believes that the policy should be reassessed because "it's too early to decide at fourteen that you can give something like that up." The LSE Language Centre, he noted, receives considerable interest from "UK students who had to give up languages at school and really want to catch up with it now." The alarming disparity in linguistic knowledge between UK and foreign students is a real cause for concern. "It really is quite sad," he said, "that so many of our beginners' Spanish or beginners' French classes are [for] UK students. Non-UK students are actually doing two languages...and can speak excellent English." In competitive employment markets targeted by LSE graduates, whether an applicant can speak a foreign language is seen as a means of differentiating between strong candidates. "English students tend to fall at that first hurdle," Byrne noted. Some universities are con- sidering action which may push secondary schools to give increased attention to language teaching. University College London (UCL) have approved in principle a proposal for a language qualification at the age of sixteen to be a compulsory requirement for all its degree courses. The proposal was made by Professor Michael Worton, Vice-Provost of UCL and Chair of the university's Academic Committee. Speaking to The Beaver, Worton said that the specifics of the new standard were still being debated, but the changed degree requirements would be introduced in phases, first targeting "subjects where it would seem to be an obvious area." Worton agreed that schools and pupils would need time to adjust to the new standard, with the first students facing the language requirement entering UCL from 2012. Worton also spoke of the cultural benefits of learning a language and its importance to students' development as "global citizens". They hope that universities would play a more active role in stopping "the decline in knowledge of inter-cultural issues" through reaffirming the importance of languages. There are concerns however, that demanding a GCSE or equivalent in a language is incompatible with the aim of widening participation in higher education. Alexandra Vincenti, the LSE Students' Union (SU) Education and Welfare Officer, said: "The changes UCL has made...are somewhat controversial in that they could be seen to disadvantage students coming from less privileged state schools where language learning has perhaps not been given as much weight." However, Vincenti also said that leading universities have a key role in "encouraging the government to re-consider the priority it gives to foreign languages in the national curriculum." Worton agreed, suggesting that a commitment by more UK universities to a policy similar to UCL's would be an "enormously powerful" means of encouraging more language teaching in schools. According to Worton, other members of the Russell Group of leading universities, which includes Oxford, Cambridge and the LSE, have already been in touch with UCL about the matter. When asked his opinion of UCL's proposals, Nick Byrne expressed no outright support. He declared the policy "an interesting thing to ruffle feathers and make waves," and confessed to being "surprised" by the move. CONTINUED FROM FRONT PAGE chairmanship of British Petroleum (BP) - a company with alleged human rights and environmental abuses. Protestors remained on stage with banners and prevented Sutherland from delivering his public lecture. When Sutherland eventually joined the stage to speak, the protestors stood up and blocked him from the audience. The lecture was subsequently moved to the New Theatre, where reporters from The Beaver and PuLSEfm were not given access. Controversy had ensued ever since opponents of the sit-in had argued that the protestors had denied Sutherland his right to free speech following their success in preventing Sutherland from speaking in the Old Theatre. "Contfoversy had ensued ever since opponents of the sit-in had argued that tlie protestors had denied Sutherland his light to free speech..." The proponents of the censures argued that the motion was separate from whether people are in favour or against The UGM voted down the motions of censure proposed against LSE SU Executive Officers Sutherland becoming the Chair of the LSE's Council, but rather about whether his freedom of speech should have been infringed upon. The proponents also argued that the protestors had been given an opportunity to question Sutherland, and that they had further rejected a democratic vote of the audience at the public lecture, who wanted Sutherland to speak. They also claimed that the protest damaged relations between the SU and the School. Opponents of the censures however, said that the censures were not about whether one agreed with the protest, but rather about whether one believed that censures are the right course of action. It was argued that censures are only suitable for much more serious offences, such as the spending of SU funds illegally and gross mismanagement. Furthermore, the opponents of the censure disputed the argument that the protest had damaged relations between the School and the SU, saying that the School was aware that the action was taken by the protestors in a personal capacity and did not represent the mandate of the SU. The opponents also said that the protest was not intend- ed to obstruct Sutherland's freedom of speech, but rather to achieve democratic rights for students by asking that Sutherland's appointment as Chair of the LSE's Council face a student referendum. There was heated debate on the motion, with applause and cheers frequently accompanying the speakers. One particular issue which came to the forefront of the argument was the separation of public and private spheres in the life of a popularly elected representative. The proponents of the censure stated that student representatives should not be permitted to carry out such "You cannot censure people because they have political \iews." Fatima Manji, speaking against the motion actions, which don't necessarily represent the views of the student body. Former Sabbatical Officer Chris Heathcote argued that the distinction between public and private in this case was arbitrary, and the protestors should not have used Joel Kenrick's office to make ban- ners and Aled Fisher's LSE SU Executive email account for campaigning. However, Kenrick responded by saying that this error had been corrected and the use of an email account did not justify a censure. At one point, F^tima Manji, speaking against the censures, pointed out that Heathcote had survived a censure last year despite being involved in the Athletics Union (AU) Barrel, in which LSE students caused criminal damage to the King's College London Strand campus. A censure for a peaceful political protest undertaken in a personal capacity was therefore certainly unjustified, she argued. She continued, saying: "You cannot censure people because they have political views." Since the protest, Lord Grabiner, the outgoing Chair of the LSE's Council, has sent a letter to SU General Secretary Jimmy Tam, outlining the appointment procedure of Sutherland. Furthermore, sources confirm that a UGM motion concerning the appointment of Peter Sutherland is being discussed by those against it. It is understood that the motion calls for a student referendum. James Ketteringham said: "The motion summarises [our] concerns and objectives. I hope the motion will pass. I hope a referendum is held. It will be an opportunity for the LSE community to voice its opinion on who should fill this position." + NEWS IBeaverl 9 January 2007 03 Academics call for total freedom Timothy Root News Editor Academics for Academic Freedom (AFAF), an influential group of more than 60 UK academics, issued a statement calling for a change in the law this Christmas to ensure academic freedom in the UK exists entirely uninhibited. The group, which includes Simon Davies, co-director of the LSE's Policy Engagement Research Group, hopes that academics may become entirely free to "question and test received wisdom, and to put forward unpopular opinions." This appeal comes at a particularly relevant time, both nationally and at the LSE. Andrew Mcintosh, a professor of thermodynamics at the University of Leeds, has recently been heavily criticized for his claim that the world is only 6,000 years old, and that therefore evolutionary theory is wrong. Similarly, Frank Ellis, a lecturer in Russian and Slavonic studies, also at University of Leeds, recently took early retirement before facing a disciplinary enquiry into his comment that white people are more intelligent than black people. At the LSE, Satoshi Kanazawa, a reader in management and research methodology, recently faced heavy criticism in the national press as well as at the LSE for his recently published paper. The LSE appears to accept AFAF calls for academic freedom which argued that "individuals in wealthier and more egalitarian societies live longer and stay healthier not because they are wealthier or more egalitarian but because they are more intelligent." Critics of Kanazawa included Professor George Gaskell, Head of the LSE's Methodology Unit, who argued that "there are serious method- ological flaws in the paper", ultimately warning that it should be taken "with a bowl, not just a pinch, of salt". Students at the School also spoke out against Kanazawa's work with some students attempting to publicly condemn him at the Union General Meeting (UGM) of the LSE Students' Union (SU). Kanazawa recently publicly defended himself last December in the Times Higher Education Supplement. He argued: "Academic freedom must be upheld, not because it is an inalienable, God-given right of all scientists, but because it is the best way to attain the truth. Sunlight is the best disinfectant...The only responsibility that scientists have is to the truth. Scientists are not responsible for the potential or actual consequences of the knowledge they create." The LSE, having not officially intervened or publicly renounced Kanazawa's research, appears to have behaved in accord with AFAF demands. Under its Codes of Practice on Free Speech, the LSE outlines its policy that restricting the academic voice, whether in lectures or published material, does constitute a violation of free speech, also according to UN and EU law cited in the Codes. Davies is quoted on the AFAF website as saying: "I'm deeply worried about the number of academics who flee in terror at the slightest wisp of controversy. Rather than engage the world in a spirit of challenge, too many academics have been sedated by an oppressive environment of political correctness and risk aversion." In its official statement, AFAF explains that "In today's political climate it is harder than ever for academics to defend open debate. Restrictive legislation, and the bureaucratic rules and regulations of government quangos and of universities themselves, have undermined academic freedom. Many academics are fearful of upsetting managers and politicians by expressing controversial opinions. Afraid to challenge mainstream thought, many pursue self-censorship." ¦The University and College Union (UCU), whose joint president Dennis Hayes leads the AFAF signatories, has warned that this appeal could potentially create further problems for academic freedom. Roger Kline, the UCU's head of equality, said: "We should distinguish between the crucial right of an academic to question and test received wisdom and any suggestions that this is the same as an unlimited right of a university academic to express, for example, anti-Semitic, homophobic or misogynist abuse where they were using a position of authority to bully students or staff, or potentially breach the duty of care that universities have towards students or staff." Bankside Hoiise ground floor burgled Ali Moussovi News Editor A room in Bankside House was burgled prior to the start of term last Thursday night. CCTV confirmed after the incident that a man on a bicycle opened the window of a first floor room from outside and entered for approximately a minute stealing a mobile phone. The incident occurred around midnight, when the student occupier of the room left the window tilted slightly open and the closed the curtains to leave the room and take a shower. The Bankside House windows are often left tilted open at the top, but seem out of the reach of someone standing at street-level outside. The burglar rode by on his bicycle once before returning Photograph: Liam CKamben to the site and managing to open the window fully. The closed curtains suggest that the burglar was unsure whether the room was occupied and therefore it is suspected that he peered through to check before entering. dos;\! .¦ level and so It is possible that the burglar used his bicycle to elevate himself. CCTV was placed at too far a distance to obtain clear identification of the burglar and this problem was compounded by the absence of street lighting on that particular side of Bankside. The student indicated that Bankside House security "could not have been more helpful...We asked to look through CCTV and he did it there and then for us. In the morning as well, reception was really helpful with police and checking to ensure maintenance fixed my window...It is something that Banksiders living on the ground floor need to be aware of." The next morning a letter was written to ground floor residents of Bankside House warning students to close their windows when leaving the room and not leaving valuables unattended. ZOAft The street which the window looks onto lacks lighting The burglar stole the mobile phone but left too soon to search for other items of value. The student occupier was not in possession of a laptop, and so the burglar is assumed to have had difficulty in finding other items to steal. The burglary was only realized approximately two hours after the incident when the student noticed her missing phone. After finding a broken piece of the window mechanism on the floor of her bedroom, she opened the curtains to find that the window had been opened fully. Bankside House security suspects that the window was too high to enter from street- Photograph: Li ¦¦ ¦ vrm 1.) This was the window, that the burglar entered to gain access to the room. 2.) This CCTV camera was unable to obtain a clear sighting the burglar due to its angle and proximity in relation to the window. 3.) i^Ster the incident, the footage from this CCTV camera was used to identify that the burglar had entered the premises. The absence of street lighting on this road made it even harder for the CCTV cameras to identify the burglar. Union Jack Happy new year everyone from your beloved Uncle Jack! However more important than your anonymous interlocutor's festive felicitations is this announcement... 'God is a Green'. As Carys Heathcote (They could share mono-grammed towels) rose to de-cry the Green infidels, who had the tenacity to state that they'd rather drown Peter Sutherland in British Petroleum than talk to him, the microphone crackled. Mrs Heathcote's waffle was cut into by something that sounded loosely like Radio 3. 'It's a Caspell Conspiracy', someone cried. Jack fears it was divine intervention. Aside from this sporadic deity-based episode; Balls-Up O'Brien assured that her 'last involvement in SU politics' (Jack really hopes so) was a wholly Godless affair. Her continuous use of expletives made her seem like a 60's comic on a heroin high. However her liberal use of language was juxtaposed with her 'John Reid-esque' exclusionary style of governance. Four people were thrown from the room and Jack lost count at the amount of ASBO's (Warnings) that Dung-Face O'Brien handed out. Jack's going to miss her - He'll need another hack to mock from now on. That person may well be 'B' Over Biggs' (BOB for short). Fighting against his ex-co-edi-tor 'Fat-head Manji' he tried to censure the noble Greens. However Dilhole, Green Ken, and Cesspit had providence on their side and BOB spent most of his speech trying to convince Louise Gobinson that he hadn't copied his argument from 'the Economist'. It looks like BOB's political days in the SU are over. However that need not stop him. After all it hasn't stopped Matt Sinclair from turning up to celebrate his 'Diamond Anniversary' with the LSE SU at the UGM. Legend has it that diamonds are forever. Alas Sinclair is long past his sell-by-date and accordingly his presence repulsed even his once wowed Tory fledglings. In the words of his idol, Maggie Thatcher, 'Get a job you bum'. Sinclair's one worthwhile contribution to the proceedings was to shake the hand of keeper creator, Rhys Smeggy. Smeggy insisted that that we join him in assuring that someone wear a pointy hat, cape and silent point at the paper offenders. His sole objective? To assure someone looks like a total fool at each UGM. Jack has three words for Smeggy -C&S. Yet each new year must begin with an honour from the one gone past. Jack presents this honour to our very own Comical Ali. The Dewj Bag wins the 'Jack's Services to Irony Award 2006'. He stood before the jeering mob, greasy charm on stand by, to oppose keeper creation. He told us that to create a position which has no use, nor function to the Union would demean the Union and waste sabbatical time. Don't look now Ali but Jack has the feeling you've just mass-debated your own demise. Maybe he'll have better luck next year? "h NEWS 04 IBeaverl 9 January 200 unty IS On 3 January 2007 four reporters fronn The Beaver walked into security for over an liour and a lialf, they gained access to Safe because CCTV is watching? Not with these cameras. The entrance of High Holborn: Despite supposedly needing to swipe a pre-programmed card to enter the hall of residence, The Beaver reporters entered without being stopped or questioned by security. Once inside the halls, reporters walked down corridors testing doors to find open flats. Several doors were found to be either malfunctioning or left open carelessly by residents. Over six flats had their main doors open for Beaver reporters to walk into easily. Therefore, they had potential access to roughly thirty rooms inside the flats. When The Beaver reporters entered one room in one of several open and easily-accessible flats, they found the following important documents and electronics of considerable value. This area is under 24 hour TV surveillance This camora shoulfi he. monitdrf'd around the fJock. Ws> take a picluff.' looking slraighl at it. Mo one doo.s anything After exploring unlocked rooms. Beaver reporters were able to gain access to the roof of the hall lounge. There, they found several open windows from which they could have gained access to more rooms. Clockwise from top left: Flat-screen TV, iPod, banking and personal documents, and passport all lying out in the open. NEWS leaver I 9 January 2007 LSE's High Holborn hall of residence. Unchallenged by at least six flats and several security-sensitive areas. Climb out of window onto roof of cafeteria, and then over the railing and into the next building. 05 THIS STUD^^M-BSIPENCE OF THE SCHOOL AND POLlflCAL SCIENCE r WAS OPENED ON jl6 OCTOBER 1995 BY ERIC FORTH MP BROKEN INTO BY THE BEAVER REPORTERS ON 3 JANUARY 2007 Maryiebone Warvrick Balfour CONTIACTOf^xoVlll CONSTRUCTION LIMITED AltCHITECT-lKA PROJECT DESIGN & MANAGEMENT While in High Holbom, Beaver reporters noticed serious hazards to residents' safety. The fire exit staircase can take you from any floor to a gate at the back of the building. Press a button to open the gate and you are home free. With goods in hand " (in our case, a camera full of pictures and a lead story for The Beaver), our reporters tried, and suceeded, in finding an easy escape route out of High Holborn. The reporters then found an unlocked maintenance room with an open cabinet of keys for every room in the hall. Also in the maintenance room were a stock of microwaves, kettles, and a number of dummy CCTV cameras. This mattress lying in the middle of a corridor in High Holborn restricts access to and from the rooms, and poses a serious fire hazard. Exposed heating pipes lie open in a residential corridor. 061 IBeaver 9 January 2007 NEWS Ringmar makes official freedom of speech complaint to the LSE Laura Deck News Editor Former LSE Senior Lecturer in Government, Dr Erik Ringmar, has made a formal complaint to the LSE Free Speech Group about the School's reaction to controversial statements he made at an Open Day on 22 March 2006 and in his online blog. Ringmar claims that the Convener of the Government Department, Dr George Philip, and LSE Director Howard Davies violated his right to freedom of expression according to the LSE Code of Practice on Free Speech. Ringmar's Open Day speech included, among other remarks, statements that "first-class teachers usually will have their minds elsewhere than on undergraduate teaching," and "an undergraduate today is worth three-thousand pounds." One entry in Ringmar's blog questioned why more non-British staff at the LSE were not promoted to high-level academic positions. He also posted the text of his Open Day speech on his blog. Ringmar's comments angered many who felt that Ringmar had damaged the reputation of the School. Following the remarks Ringmar was reprimanded by Philip. In addition to warning Ringmar about his Open Day comments, Philip demanded that Ringmar "destroy/cancel [his] blog entirely and shut the whole thing down." LSE Director Howard Davies agreed with Philip's recommendations, and in an email to Ringmar he said that he found Ringmar's behaviour "most disappointing". Ringmar subsequently took down his blog, but later chose to re-post it. He maintained that it was within his right to free speech to keep a blog and to say whatever he wished in that blog. In his recent letter of 20 December 2006 to the Free Speech Group, Ringmar cited the LSE Code of Practice, which incorporates the United Nations Covenant on Civil and Political Rights, Article 19, which guarantees freedom of expression: "Action by any member of the School or other person contraiy to this Code, will be regarded as a serious disciplinary offence and, subject to the circumstances of the case, may be subject of proceedings under the relevant disciplinary regulations, as promulgated from time to time." Ringmar went on to say that "Philip reprimanded me for speaking to students in my own fashion and Davies issued threats against me for things I wrote in my blog. As a consequence, my right to free speech has been taken away. They have, as far as I understand it, acted 'contrary to this Code' and their actions should be 'regarded as a serious disciplinary offence.'" In a blog entry, shortly after the Open Day in question, Ringmar wrote that "the LSE explicitly incorporates article 19 of the UN Human Rights Declaration in its Charter. This article guarantees the freedom of expression. The LSE must live up to its own rules. There is a difference between a great university and Wal-Mart or the Chinese authorities." The letter to the Free Speech Group also suggests that the School should establish a formal policy on free speech to address the rights of bloggers and internet users. LSE collaborates with UAE for new Middle East Centre Vishal Banerjee Anew Centre for Middle Eastern Studies is to be opened at the LSE. The project has been agreed upon by the LSE and the Emirates Foundation, the philanthropic organisation of the United Arab Emirates (UAE). Also present at the agreement were Prime Minster Tony Blair and the UAE Minister for Economy Sheikha Lubna A1 Qasimi. Signing the proposal at Zayed University was LSE Director Howard Davies and Ahmed All A1 Sayegh, managing director of the Emirates Foundation. A1 Sayegh welcomed the agreement, saying: "The Emirates Foundation is investing in the Centre for Middle Eastern Studies because we believe the UAE and countries of the region will benefit from research and analysis conducted at the LSE. We are also eager to support initiatives which bring tangible benefits to UAE students, in this case those students interested in pursuing further studies in the UK." The Emirates Foundation have considered naming the main lecture theatre within the building the Sheikh Zayed Lecture Theatre, after the former ruler of Abu Dhabi who died in 2004, a proposal that will cost £2.5 million. However, the final amount spent on the centre by the Foundation is estimated to reach £9 million. Both sides of the project have reached agreement that social science research centres of this kind would enable the Middle East as a region to understand some of its modem day political, economic and social issues, and would be in a better position to tackle them. The project will specifically target young students from the £g mOlion - estimated endo^vment of the Emirates Foimdation UAE and other countries within the region, in the hope that they will come to the UK in order to pursue their academic interests at an undergraduate and post-graduate level. The LSE currently has 54 undergraduates, 111 postgraduates and 1,400 alumni from the Middle East. Howard Davies enthusiastically greeted the centre, saying he was "most grateful to the Foundation for its support, which will get our centre off to a flying start. And we look forward to working closely with the Foundation to try to increase the flow of well-qualified students from the UAE to the UK in general and to LSE in particular." Professor Fred Halliday of the International Relations Department at the LSE, is the director designate of the centre for Middle Eastern Studies, although the Emirates Foundation have themselves consented to endow a new chair. The Foundation has also agreed to aid and finance conferences and publications, both of which will be designed to expose the work being done in the UK throughout the Middle East. The two governments involved in this collaboration have also been enthusiastic towards the centre, saying that "this agreement will have an important role in continuing to develop both academic excellence and mutual exchange and understanding between our young people." In a speech to business leaders in Dubai, Tony Blair said: "I have agreed in my talks with Their Highness, the President, the Prime Minister and the Crown Prince that we shall be establishing greater educational and traditional exchange. Yesterday, I was present at the signature and agreement between the London School of Economics and the Emirates Foundation on the establishment of the Sheikh Zayed Chair in Regional studies at the LSE's new Middle East Centre, alongside a programme of educational exchange and training in both countries." The Centre for Middle Eastern Studies will be established at the LSE in 2007, having a location on the central campus itself. Last year, he said that "no one should have to go through the kind of abuse and harassment that I have had to suffer." The LSE, like many institutions and organisations, does not have specific rules to address the rights and limits of bloggers. Meanwhile, the popularity and the number of blogs on the internet has soared in recent years. Davies felt that the controversy did not concern blog-spe-cific rules but "whether a colleague can publicly abuse his employer and his colleagues without consequences." When asked whether the complaint constitutes a violation of his freedom of speech, an LSE spokesperson said: "This matter is the subject of ongoing correspondence between the School and Dr Ringmar so it would be inappropriate to comment at this time." Since the Open Day incident Ringmar announced he would leave the School after a previously planned leave of absence during which he moved to National Chiao Tung University in Taipei, Upon his departure, he expressed concern to The Beaver that the School's reputation was declining not due to his comments, but because the LSE was turning into "a market-driven educational machine," particularly in light of the recent appointments of non-academics to high-level positions. Volunteering and part-time students may receive discount on fees Michael Deas Students who volunteer or study part-time while working may receive a discount on their tuition fees under new government proposals. The plans are part of a wider government strategy to encourage young people, especially those from poorer backgrounds, to participate in higher education. The Government claims its new 'Earn to Learn' programme will make it easier for people to gain a degree while still working part-time. However, part-time students still have to pay their fees upfront rather than after graduation. Critics argue that this is a problem that a small discount in tuition fees would not solve. NUS Vice-President Wes Streetin welcomed the proposals to reduce the fees of students who carry out a significant amount of volunteer work. He was pleased that the Government recognises the financial barriers to participation in volunteering, and that giving support is being considered. He said: "While the will to volunteer is there for many students, often it is the financial constraints that make this kind of activity impossible." Graham Allcott, Chief Executive of Student Volunteering England, also welcomed the proposals but argued that 42,000 students already volunteer of their own free will. He also warned against "a change in the definition of volunteering whereby it is seen as something students do just to reduce tuition fees." The LSE has indicated that future proposals will be looked at to see if they affect the School. An LSE spokesperson said: "Volunteering can be beneficial for many reasons and the School's Volunteer Centre already works to place students and staff who want to volunteer with external organisations. Over 620 people registered with the Volunteer Centre in the 2005-6 academic year." money on tuition Treasuiy economist set to return to LSE for Patel Chair Patrick Cullen Senior Reporter Sir Nicholas Stem, economist and author of the Stern Review on the Economics of Climate Change, is to become the LSE's first holder of the IG Patel Chair, and with it the Director of the School's new Asia Research Centre and its India unit. The new position is named in honour of the ninth director of the School from 1984 to 1990. Dr IG Patel, who died in July 2005, was referred to by Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh as "not only a good Economic Advisor, a good Finance Secretary, a good Central Bank Governor but also a good administrator who excelled in his understanding of the political economy of development." Singh inaugurated the post at a Conference of the LSE Asia Foram. Stern told The Times of India newspaper, "I hope to return to Palanpur sometime in the near future, perhaps in the next two to three years." Palanpur, where Stern has worked and lived from on and oft since 1974, is the location of his new research programme, the India Observatory. It has been established to study the Indian rural economy. Stem will take up his position at the School in June. Stem is currently the head of the UK Government's Economic Service, and previously held the post of Chief Photographs: Liam Chambers Stern recently spoke at the LSE on nis cnmate change report Economist and Senior Vice-President at the World Bank from 2000 to 2003. Stem will further contribute to climate change economic research at the LSE, in addition to his appointed posts. Sir Gus O'Donnell, the UK Cabinet Secretary, greeted the announcement that Stem was to take up the post, saying, "I am delighted by his appointment and am sure the LSE will also benefit from his outstanding economic expertise." Stem told the School that he was "delighted to be coming back to LSE. IG Patel first gave me the opportunity to work at LSE, and it is a great honour to hold the Chair in his name. His friendship and guidance were cherished by all who knew him. Research on Asia and on eco- nomic development has been at the heart of my academic life. I am pleased to be able to continue this work and to develop and deepen the relationship between the LSE and India." This is not the first post that Stem has held at the LSE, as he was originally the Sir John Hicks Professor of Economics from 1986 to 1993, being appointed by the then Director, IG Patel. LSE Director Howard Davies said: "His involvement as head of the Observatory and of our Asia Research Centre will enhance the School's reputation, take forward its work on Asia and continue the intellectual and political dialogue there has been between LSE and India for many years." NEWS leaverj 9 January 2007 07 Fraud and plagiarism revealed at prestigious universities in the UK Erica Gornall Senior Reporter Questions have been raised about the academic integrity of some sities following investigations revealing fraud and plagiarism at some of the UK's most prestigious institutions. According to The Times Higher Education Supplement, 25 UK academics "LSEU:-allegi-uon miscondiict,'u serioiisly...Sei misconduc. may le;.: to siaJT' being dismissed. LSE spokesperson The LSE has affirmed its commitment to treating academic misconduct very seriously have been found guilty of practices which include plagiarism, faking results and the misuse of funds. The investigation has also shown an increase in cases of academic misconduct. Figures indicate that the number of such cases has tripled since 2003, from nine to 27. Many believe that the increase in reported cases is the result of more 'zero-tolerance' policies towards academic misconduct, rather than a rise in actual cases of misconduct. Michael FUrthing, founder of the UK Research Integrity Office, said: "I think it is difficult now for institutions to shy away from taking cases forward." Some of the universities that were implicated were the University of Leeds, whose lecturer Neil Winn was found guilty of plagiarism, and the University of Glasgow, which had the most reported cases. King's College London had four reported cases. However, while such institutions have reported cases of academic misconduct, there is a significant concern for universities that have not reported any cases at all. Reports indicate a lack of pro-activeness at some institutions, including those that are research-inten-sive. As one of the most prominent research universities in the UK, the LSE does not appear in the report as one of the institutions with cases of academic misconduct. A spokesperson for the School said: "LSE takes any allegation of staff misconduct, including plagiarism, very seriously. The School has procedures in place to deal with allegations of staff misconduct, and should an allegation of professional misconduct be made, would investigate each case individually and act according to the findings. Serious misconduct may lead to staff being dismissed." Passfield Hall President resigns amid continued controversy Roger Lewis Orlando Bama, the President of the LSE's Passfield Hall of Residence, resigned towards the end of the Michelmas Term. His resignation came amid continued controversy over his Presidency of the Hall. Bama had faced a motion of censure from the Passfield Committee. However, due to disagreement in the committee over whether Bama should be censured, a referendum was called. Bama ended his presidency before the vote took place. Recently, Bama faced a constitutional complaint by residents, having requested new computers for the Hall's computer room despite the Passfield Committee arguing against this course of action. After an investigation led by Louise Robinson, the LSE Students' Union (SU) Residences Officer, Bama was cleared of malpractice on the grounds that no official committee vote was taken on the decision of requesting new computers. However, Bama's actions did raise wider concerns of his allegedly "dictatorial" style. On the other hand, many of Bama's supporters felt that the dispute was personal, citing his status as a postgraduate as potentially angering undergraduates who differ in outlook. A Passfield Committee member said that most members of the Committee are "relieved" at his decision to resign, despite the belief that Bama was generally popular among residents. One resident said: "Bama was a quality guy who really listened to people. The idea everyone in the Hall wanted him to go is a myth. We voted for him because he was the best guy. His opposition couldn't accept that and that's why last term turned into such a mess." A source close to the Committee, criticised the "Passfield Hall loves a good drama and in my view ihe whole thing is a result of Passfield placing out its o^vn little soap opera." Passfield Resident recent disruption, saying: "Orlando has gone and this is will hopefully be the end. But Passfield Hall loves a good drama and in my view the whole thing is a result of Passfield playing out its ovra little soap opera. The Hall actually enjoys it. It's pathetic." Passfield Hall has faced controversy under Bama's presidency Many have cited the controversy at Passfield as being an example of personal clashes becoming an obstacle to effective governance by a hall's committee. Robinson said: "Orlando's resignation saddens me. A replacement will have to be elected this term, and all hall committees should expect subtle but effective changes during this year to make them more effective and accountable to residents. I am confident the remaining committee wiU continue to work in the best interests of all Passfield residents." ••I! m Universities call for increase in funding after fees cap rises Doug Oliver Senior Reporter Universities from across the UK called on the Government to increase core funding to the sector by almost 20 per cent, last month. The call came from the umbrella group Universities UK, which represents university Vice-Chancellors. This has come just months after universities were permitted to increase fees to a maximum level of £3,000 per year. The request for a further £1.3 billion pounds was needed to fund two per cent or 22,000 extra students annually. According to Diana Warwick, the Chief Executive of Universities UK, the quality of teaching and research is heavily reliant on government funding. Warwick said that it needed to be maintained "in order to compete in an international market." Next year universities are set to receive £6.9 billion, of which £738 million is capital money earmarked for investment in building and infrastructure projects. Therefore, the extra money that Universities UK is requesting is significant despite the organisation being adamant that universities are simply seeking financial stability. Universities UK has said that £750 million is needed for building upgrade work, while about £90 million is needed to teach more students. The rest would be dedicated to fund teacher-training, part-time courses and to support research and development projects. Graeme Davis, Funding and Management Policy Committee Chairman of Universities UK, said that the expansion of higher education in the 1990s had been achieved at the expense of long term infrastructural development. While Davis was pleased to note "diversification of our income sources, the most significant being the introduction of variable tuition fees," he expressed concern that "the sector's finances are still in something of a fragile state, and any reduction in public income would put us back into an unsustainable situation." Chancellor of the Exchequer Gordon Brown recently reaffirmed his commitment to higher education in the pre-Budget report, and stressed the importance to the UK of a high-skill knowledge base in order for it to compete in the world economy. LSE Deputy Director Paul Johnson indicated the School's support for the submission. He said: "More funding is always welcome and we agree with Universities UK's call for the government to maintain its investment in higher education." ^ Are you interested in being a member of The Beaver^s News Desk? We are currently searching for new SENIOR REPORTERS toman the News Desk. The Senior Reporter Unit is the nnain arm of the News Desk, As Senior Reporter, you will be writing and researching the important stories. You will work closely with the News Editors, while retaining independence to pursue certain stories and developments as you see fit. If interested, contact: TheBeover.News@lse.ac.uk . and we will send you an :¦ application form. , T -f 08 leaver! COMMENTSiANALYSIS ANALYSIS James Ketteringham, tells us hcnv we must embrace activism to forw-ard our agendas Dr Strangehack Or: How I learned to stop worrying and love student activism James^ Ketteri We are all members of a society plagued with problems; poverty, deprivation, repression, discrimination, environmental degradation. As students of the LSE we are all members of an organisation with the founding aim of 'The Betterment of Society'. I have never taken a class in 'The Betterment of Society', there are no lecturers on the subject and there is no degree program in for students to pursue it. Yet this is the School's founding aim. I don't blame the School for this gap in the syllabus. 'The Betterment of Society' cannot be done in lectures, classes or the library. But I believe it can be done and should be done. As students of the LSE we are all automatically members of the Students' Union. I believe through the Students' Union we should be struggling for change in society because we c I are able to recog- , nise that society needs changing. Mi . , Change is 3 ! , done most easily by those in command of organisations with power over society; but we are not in any government, we are not on the boards of any of the multi national company and we do not have a majority on Westminster City Council nor the Council of the LSE (the LSE's governing body). This means that we cannot commission change by a single order or by winning a single vote. Without direct access to the mechanisms of power; activism is the way for us to change society for the better. We will need to research, write, report, march, campaign, petition, leaflet and even sit-in to apply pressure to those in power. We must be active to ensure we, and our concerns, cannot be ignored. Achieving change through student activism is a long, difficult and controversial task. We might not win every fight and we will only achieve change in small steps. But this does not make our concerns less valid, nor improving society less important, it just makes it harder. Since change will be difficult we will must work together in an organisation designed to push for change. This is why the Students' Union becomes important; it is a vehicle for change. The students union has the resources, the funding, the size and the organisational structure to facilitate our campaigns and allow continuity - to allow the next generation of LSE students to carry on our campaigns. It is a vehicle to better society of students; a way of improving life for LSE stu- dents through providing support, counselling, guidance and representation. Moreover, the SU is our vehicle for change, it belongs to its members and its aims are solely to serve its members. This means that it can be changed by its members; the best recent example would be the proposals to introduce microwaves to the quad. This isn't betterment of global society, it doesn't end poverty or climate change - but it makes the LSE society better. The microwave proposal was introduce through a passing a motion at the Union General Meeting. This is the procedure for altering union policy. A motion is not an end in itself, it can only change the internal policy of the SU. But it can be used to change internal policy of the SU to campaign for bigger change; those concerned by low pay used UGM motions to obtain SU support for a Living Wage for LSE cleaning staff , those concerned by climate change introduced a annual global climate change week. These are only two of the recent campaigns given union backing by the UGM, anyone can submit a motion - it is the means to direct the Union for the betterment of society. The SU will never end We must be active to ensure our concerns cannot be ignored poverty or climate change; that will take innumerable hours of work and the support, not only of those in power, but of hundreds of millions of others. The SU can take steps which bring these ends closer; for instance Climate Change Awareness Week and its support for a Living Wage. Indeed these are small steps, but they are our contribution to the fight. PuLSE head of production Dan Dolan says the radio can be the hub of creativity in our staid social science institution Creative Pulse should be beating Dan Dolan '. J. I think we'd all agree that for all it's positive qualities, our university does not possess the most thriving creative community. LSE's student body can be passionate and active. But it's the unfortunate truth that at present the London School of Economics does not buzz with excitement about new music and art. It's not that the people aren't there. A huge number of students crave a cultural community in tune with the artistic buzz London has always offered. Whilst we live in a city awash with cutting edge entertainment, the university itself does not provide a gateway to this side of London life. I don't think that we should have to escape LSE to find culture, art and music. Whilst it doesn't seem like it now, the university itself can be a cultural centre. This won't happen overnight. It takes a change in the general atmosphere of the institution. I believe that Pulse FM, which in the last few months has developed by leaps and bounds, can be hugely important in making the LSE a more creative, musically and artistically passionate imiversity. This year, Pulse has committed itself to bringing exciting new music to the airwaves. We now have live bands in the studio on a regular basis, showcasing some of London's best unsigned acts. Many of us have a love for live music and for new artists. We hope this growing area of the station can play a part in encouraging appreciation of talented musicians, and provide a forum for young singers within the LSE. We are working to connect the university to London's live music scene, and the station's music team works every week to review the best new gigs. The team also does regular write ups of the newest singles and albums, the best of which are put on our regular playlist. This commitment to great music is sustained and kept alive by our passionate DJs. We have lined up a solid schedule incorporating Indie and 2007 will be a good year for culture at the LSE Electronica, RnB and Hip-Hop, Alternative bands and Classic Rock. Ministry of Sound's DJ Vigz, one of the city's most successful new Djs, holds the station's highest lis-tenership figures with his 'Urbantainment' show. Close on his heels are Elisa Prosperetti's "Hang and Bang Mondays" and Felix SuUivan's surreal "Big Hits and Nasty Cuts" - rock classics from a man whose track selections are as volatile as his mental state. There is something for everyone, all available at the click of a mouse on www.pulsefm.co.uk, where we stream 24 hours a day. If you love music, you will find something for you on Pulse. Music, whilst integral to the station, is only the beginning. Whilst the Beaver publishes one issue every Tuesday, Pulse is played 24 hours a day, seven days a week. This allows us to stay right up to the minute on the latest news stories. The Peter Sutherland protest last term was a perfect example. All heU broke loose as crusading student firebrands took on the new Chair of the LSE council. The nature of the printed news cycle meant that it would be almost a week before the Beaver could publish coverage. The Media Group cooperated like never before, working late into the night to share sound-clips and quotes. The dynamic duo of Erica Gomall and Ali Moussavi, respective newsies at Pulse and the Beaver, made sure the two offices worked together to give the event the attention it deserved. By the next morning. Pulse were broadcasting recorded interviews with the protesters, along with a now infamous sound clip of the LSE head of security growling repeatedly for journalists to "Get out of his Eace". For the first time last term, Pulse established itself as a valuable and up to date news provider and Erica Gomall's stewardship has kept it a rigorous and detailed source. Significant improvements in the website have led to an ease of access unlike anything the station has seen before. We have recently pioneered a pod-casting system which will make key shows, interviews and news available to download online. If you missed Alan Fletcher (Doctor Karl Kennedy from Neighbours) being interviewed live, or didn't catch us dropping the proverbial bomb with . the great Tim Westwood, you can just pick up the recording at our website. We are working to make Pulse more and more accessible to students, with a wide ranging publicity drive featuring daily flyers to boost the profile of the station and it's DJs. In the second week of term. Pulse is holding a huge party in the Quad, featuring up and coming bands 'Fear of Flying' and 'The Jubilees'. It's going to be an amazing evening, and is already being listed in Time Out. As an expanding part of the SU, we are always looking for new people to get involved; if you are interested we would love to hear from you. Please come along to the party, get in touch, and most of all, come online and listen in. An active student radio station can be extremely effective in more of a cultural community among students. I don't think that anyone would disagree that LSE needs some help in this area. By increasing live performances, playing exciting new music and broadcasting regular news programmes in touch with student issues, we hope to play a part in this. This year, Kayt Berry has led a team that is more united than ever before, and moulded Pulse into an organisation primed for success. Her leadership has taken the radio station from junior partner in the Media Group to something that has the potential to be so much more. There is, of course, work to be done, but I think it's without question that there are conunitted and enthusiastic people ready to handle it. Take my word for it: 2007 wiU be a good year for PiUse FM, and for culture in LSE. 2nd Floor, Eosf Building LSE Students' Union London WC2A 2AE email: thebeaver^se.ac.uk Published since 1949. EXECUTIVE EDITOR Sidhanth Katnath MANAGING EDITOR Chris Lam SECRETARY Lucie Gouiet BUSINESS MANAGER Ismat Abidi NEWS EDITORS Laura Deck; Ali Moussavi; Timothy Root FEATURES EDITORS Fatima Manji; Charlie Satnuda PART B EDITORS Kevin Perry; Daniel B.Yates SPORTS EDITORS Joey Mellows; Laura Parfitt GRAPHICS SUB-EDITOR Aditi Nangia PHOTOGRAPHY SUB-EDITOR Liam Chambers C&A SUB-EDITOR Simon Dougias Editorial Assistant Christine Whyte iBusiness Team: Saurabh Isharma, Tim Turner, AnneHes Vermeulen Marketing Team: Pierre Degrave, EMsa Eymery, Johan Raymond, trma Raza ' Admin Team: Rahul Srivatsa, Anna Tveritinova, Wong Chun Han, lily Yang THE COLLECTIVE: Chairperson: AlexTeytelboym Ross Allan; Andhalib Karim; Sam Ashton; Sancha Sainton; Fadhil Bakeer-Markar; Wil Barber; Alex Barros-Curtis; Rothna Begum; Ruby Bhavra; Neshy Boukhari; Clem Broumley-Young; James Bull; Sam Burke; Andy Burton; Sumit Buttoo; Ed Calow; jess Cartwright; James Caspeil; Claire Cheriyan; Simon Chlgnell; Dave Cole; Chris Colvtn; Laura Coombe; Richard Coopey; Owen Coughlan; Peter Currie; Patrick Cullen; James Oavies; Michael Deas; Ali Oewji; Jan Daniel Dormann; Matt Dougherty; Aled Dilwyn Fisher; Alex George; Ben Gianforti; Rupert Guest; Steve Gummer; Andrew Hallett; Charlie Halllon; Wong Chun Han; Chris Heathcote; Josh Heller; Tahiya Islam; William Joce; Lois Jeary; Laleh Kazemi-Veisari; Joel Kenrlck; James Ketteringham; Arthur Krebbers; Sanjivt Krtshnan; Ben Lamy; Charles Laurence; Roger Lewis; Shu Hao Don Lim; James Longhofer; Ziyaad Lunat; Clare Mackle; Kim Mandeng; Jami Makan; Joey Mellows; Nitya Menon; Jessica McArdle; Ju McVeigh; Sophie Middlemiss; Daisy Mitchel-Forster; Chris Naylor; Doug Oliver; Erin Orozco; Aba Osunsade; Rob Parker; Matthew Partridge; Rajan Patel; Keith Postler; John Philpott; Joe Quaye; Gareth Rees; Louise Robinson; Alex Small; Rebecca Stephenson; Jimmy Tam; Alex Teytelboym; Angus Tse; Molly Tucker; Vladimir Unkovski-Korica; Louise Venables; Alexandra VIncenti; Claudia Whitcomb; Greg White; Amy Williams; Yee To Wong PRINTED BYTHE NORTHCLIFFE PRESS If you have written three or more articles for The Beaver and your name does not appear in the Collective, please email: theb€aver.editor^tse.a€.uk and you will be added to the list in next week's paper. m The Beaver Is available in alternative formats. The views and opinions expressed in the Beaver are those of the contributors and not necessarily those of the editors or the LSE Students' Union + COMMENT&ANALYSIS 9 January 2007 COMMENT & ANALI^IS I^eaver Established 1949 - Issue 654 Breaking into halls couldn't be easier ...as strangers can simply walk through the front door LSE's provisions for security in Residences are clearly inadequate. This week The Beaver's investigations have shown just how simple it is to gain access to a student residence, entering both students' rooms and supposedly secure areas. Unlocked doors and fire exits make for easy access. Had our reporters been interested in theft they would have been able to acquire amongst other things a British passport, an i-pod, an entire stock of microwaves and a brand new dummy CCTV camera. Not to mention the keys to every room at High Holbom, which were rather conveniently stored in an unlocked basement room, putting every resident at risk. Meanwhile at Bankside, unmonitored CCTV footage recorded a man breaking and entering through a ground floor window into a student's room. In less than a minute, he was able to steal the student's mobile phone and leave entirely unnoticed. Further, last term The Beaver was able to show that the level of security is such that a single individual was able to live illegally in Rosebery Hall and elsewhere on campus for years entirely escaping notice of security and concern from students. What level of serious incident will need to take place for the School to actually start realising that the failure to secure its buildings is putting the welfare of students at risk? Such poor standards of security are unacceptable and fail to protect LSE students in the very place they should feel most safe; their halls of residence. It is imperative that some action be taken to highlight this issue, and students must speak out against the incompetence of the current security systems in place. At the same time, students themselves need to take heed of the safety and security advice. In a hall of residence such as High Holbom, there should be no reason that a flat door, with slam locks, should be left open so that anyone can walk in. Central London is one of the greatest places in the world to live, but the reality of the environment is such that we should not be so care-free about our own well-being or that of our belongings. It is absurd that a student considered his or her room not worth locking when it contained over £1000 worth of electronics, a passport and bank statements. This lackadaisical attitude is commonplace, and we must be careful when criticising LSE security to note that students are as much if not more to blame for their vulnerability. Perhaps this exposure will show students how important it is to take some responsibility for their belongings. Meanwhile The Beaver pledges to its readers that it will continue testing LSE security, providing a much needed test of those systems currently in place. The apparent conditions of public life ...the protest at the Sutherland talk has raised the debate over professional versus private lives At the end of last year, four SU Executive Officers faced motions of censure in the UGM for a sit-in protest which prevented the controversial future Chair of the LSE's Council, Peter Sutherland, from delivering a public lecture. A motion of censure acts as a warning and a prelude to a vote of no-confidence against an elected representative. The issue which emerged at the forefront of the debate surrounding the censures was the separation of private and public spheres in the life of a popularly elected representative. The Executive Officers claimed that they were acting in a personal capacity, while the proponents of the censure argued that an elected representative and even more so, a paid elected representative, cannot simply draw the line between private and public spheres. One of the proponents of censure argued that George W. Bush is unable to attend a similar protest for fear that he may be seen as misrepresenting the people of the United States. Yet this is argument does not stand. The failure of this argument is not because the President of the United States is a purer representative. Nor is it because our Executive consists of student politicians and so the bar of judgment is lowered. It is because it is unreasonable and unwise for us to expect more from our elected representatives than we expect from ourselves. We all have private lives. Why shouldn't are leaders have them? A fictional US Presidential candidate from a popular TV show once said, "We cling to this fantasy that there's a perfect life and that our leaders should embody it. But if we expect our leaders to live on some higher moral plane than the rest of us, well we're just asking to be deceived." It is unwise to assume that our leaders are different from us. But further to that, to think that they embody our values which include a separation of private and public spheres of life, is the very essence of a tnily representative culture. Our leaders should be judged in a professional capacity, based on what we elected them to do. We should be proud that we have elected officials who not only hold views, but are willing to express them despite their negative political impact - namely censure. Letters to the Editor The Beaver offers all readers the right to reply to anything that appears in the paper. Letters should be sent to thebeaver.edltor@lse.ac.uk and should be no longer than 250 words. All letters must be received by 3pnn on the Sunday prior to publicotion. The Beaver reserves the rioht to edit letters prior to publication._ Religious problem Dear Sir As you may well have seen, there has been some controversy of late at Exeter Students' Guild concerning the Evangelical Christian Union. In short, the society, which was renamed from the Christian Union to the Evangelical Christian Union, after a referendum of the Guild of students because of its theological leanings, has imposed a requirement tor would-be members of the society to sign what is essentially a declaration of faith that would exclude all non Christians, and some varieties of Christian. There is an even more stringent requirement for members of the committee. I do not propose to go into the machinations that have taken place at the Exeter Guild of Students, which can be found at www.guild.exeter.ac.uk/ecu, but there are some points that need to be made, which I believe are of relevance to the LSE Students' Union. Suffice to say that while the LSE SU has had illegal dealings because of the issue of paper throwing the Evangelical Christian Union at Exeter is taking the Guild for judicial review at the High Court. The there is a general tendency in society at the moment to say that because somebody's beliefs are based on religion, they are more valid than other beliefs. While I know that one's religious beliefs are a matter of deep conscience, it would be wrong to say that only religious beliefs can occupy that level of conscience, the fact that a particular group holds something to be dear, means that it should be treated sensitively and that reasonable accommodation should be made, but it does not mean that they should receive special treatment. To exclude members of an organisation from a part of that union because they will not subscribe to a particular set of beliefs, which even within the field of Christianity might be considered somewhat narrow, would lead to other groups doing the same. I would hate to see a situation where each particular flavour of Christianity feels the need to have its own society on campus that excludes aU others as much as I would hate to see the Labour Club, or even the Conservatives, Lib Dems, Greens or SWP/Respect making membership of their respective national party is a requirement to join the student society. I remember from PS 102 that forming distinct in-groups leads to the formation of out-groups and, indeed, conflict between groups. I remember similar feel-iiigs leading to unpleasant conflicts between the Israeli and Palestinian societies a few years ago, and I am sure that anybody who was involved in any way with the students union at that time would not like to see a repetition of the hostilities on campus. I find myself questioning the motives of the Evangelical Christian Union at Exeter. They must be aware by now that they are on dodgy legal ground; I feel that they will likely lose their challenge in the High Court at considerable cost to them and, if they cannot cover the Guild's costs, to the services that are provided for the benefit of students at Exeter. It is my sincere hope that this is a genuinely motivated action and not an attempt to generate publicity or sympathy. It is a deeply mistaken way of doing things, particularly as one of the aims of evangelical Christianity is to encourage people to leam about Christianity in general, and the evangelical perspective, in particular. I understand that one of the problems on campus at Exeter University is the depth of feeling that this gives rise to, and so I would hope that the LSE SU would look at situations like this in advance so that they can be N-% W considered soberly. Dave Cole Honory Student Former UGM chair "bids for sabb" Dear Sir In all the time that I've been here at the LSE I've seen hacks vie for position in their individual bids for sabb. I used to take an interest in union politics, but now it turns me off. Why? Because it seems that the hacks are in it for themselves. I say 'seems' because some of what they do may be for students - but often it just seems that they have their pre-conceived ideas and are dead set on implementing them. So, would the Man on the Clapham Omnibus say that they are already politicians? Probably. And this is the problem. People perceive that politicians are irrelevant and don't imderstand the real world. They see MPs voting for pay rises and see them as self-serving folk. Perhaps this sums up thoughts about sabbs too. In truth though, MPs are relevant and do understand real world problems. Most of us here, at the LSE, have some sort of interest in pol- itics. So, from this, we all have a responsibility to show young people that politics matters and that they can make a difference. You newspaper is at the forefront of this fight, please act responsibly. Ranil Jayawardena Former Constitution and Steering committee member Gerald Ford Dear Sir No doubt students at the LSE will have been saddened to hear the passing on of former US President Gerald Ford. Although he has been heavily criticised for having pardoned his predecessor after the Watergate Scandal, ultimately it was this move that ensured the long term stability of the American political system; a system which today is a shining example of democracy and freedom to the entire international community. In the current climate of international terrorism and threats to our freedoms, it is ever important we remember the great men that shaped America. God bless America and it's friends. Kimberly McAddams Arthur Krebbers thinks the|pE should clean up it's act., and LSE: clean image required The Beaver would like to apologise for three articles published last term that were in whole or in part copied from articles in a different publication. The matter has been dealt with and the appropriate action has been taken against the member of staff in question. Sidhanth Kamath Executive Editor Arthur-, Krebbers Restaurants are often judged by the quality of their toilets and general hygiene facilities. If this norm were to apply to universities, I doubt Gordon Ramsey would be very pleased with the LSE. In fact, I'm not sure whether we'd even manage to obtain one single shiny Michelin star. The criticisms levelled against the school's non-academic facilities are numerous. The bathrooms are littered with hatemongering and idiotic graffiti, toilets appear infected by a chestnut brown fungus and changing rooms feel like tropical, oxygenless cellars. Though these issues can easily fade into the background, they are by no means trivial. As a world-class insti- tution, we really ought to improve the quality of our facilities in order to continue to attract the creme de la creme. The impressions new arrivals have of our campus aren't limited to the academic sphere. The quality of teaching and research facilities go hand in hand with the appearance of class rooms, toilets and changing rooms. Those engaged in sports or fitness will moan repeatedly about the dire state of the changing rooms. Ditto for the early-morning cyclists. Others will lambaste the hygiene of the water closets or the interior of some of the notorious rooms in the XYZ buildings. These long- or short-term visitors will transfer their overall picture of the school to peers in their home countries, potentially leading to a renewed surge in applications. If we wish to bring about this virtuous circle, we really should clean up our act. Finger wagging towards students themselves may be a good start. Not all school facilities are problematic cases: A seasoned undergraduate will have been astonished at the purity of some departmental bathrooms. Most residential halls also appear able to sustain high standards. If we're able to behave ourselves in our departments and halls, why aren't we equally vigilant with our general Houghton Street utilities? This is only part of the story, however. Our campus regularly attracts outsiders, ranging from partygoers at Crush to uninvited, senior Londoners (even some local hobos, so I'm told). The relative openness of our university grounds means our facilities are easy to access. While the majority of 'guests' will use them with due care, others will do whatever possible to trash them. School wardens regularly complain about alcohol-induced rampages in bathrooms that tend to occur on Friday nights. There is no easy panacea to this hydra. The best way forward is through intensive cooperation between the Students' Union and the LSE Estates division. Problems with individual facilities should be reported swiftly, both by students and staff, and the school should reserve enough funds to enable it to respond quickly and effectively. Only effective commimica-tion and prioritisation will help flush this vexed issue down the drain. Beaver.. ..IS IllK 1 The Beaver is looking to expand its operations in the New Year and has vacancies in multiple departments, from editorial to production to design. Whether you are a third-year looking for distractions or a first-year who wants to get involved after a boring first term, we want YOU! No prior experience is necessary, if you are committed, able to work in a team and possess good communication skills then The Seover is the place for you. ¦frr Winners - The Beaver Survey 2006 FMIM fxirM Sanintt UmMUHetm IPOD WINNERS iPod Nano -j.bhatia@lse.ac.uk iPod Shuffle - c.singh@lse.ac.uk iPod Shuffle - m.s.mitra@lse.ac.uk CONSOLATION PRIZES Book - Golden Handcuffs - su.treasurer@lse.ac.uk Book - Golden Handcuffs - k.igras@lse.ac.uk Book - Golden Handcuffs - l.f.bauer@lse.ac.uk Beaver T-Shirt & Diary - m.e.pereira@lse.ac.uk Beaver T-Shirt & Diary - d.j.macarthur-seal@lse.ac.uk Beaver T-Shirt & Diary - hannah.baines@hotmail.co.uk Beaver T-Shirt & Diary - k.patel8@lse.ac.uk Please email thebeaver.secretary@lse.ac.uk to collect your prize. All winners will be contacted by email. The Beaver's decision is final. If you are interested in applying for a position please contact thebeavensecretaiy@lse.ac.uk POSITIONS AVAIMBLIi!: ••Veb editors fclvents team ^^uploaders/designers) ^^nembers The web editors are re- J 1* A ^ events team is a new sponsible for the design ftg/H venture and the mem-and maintainance of T/ie fHp|||pr bers would be required v||^1301*tS Desk Successful applicants would have 0^^ * the opportunity to cover major H B'Ar|Ol*i'0]*C sporting events (expenses paid) and " would also be trained as sports journalists. Forthcoming events which 4^usiness team members 0I^^0 The Business team are re- high-profile clients to ensure the paper continues to run team meets weekly to discuss conceptualise ideas about Km ' how to raise the money re-¦¦rZ^ ^ quired to produce The Beaver UM M and even more to ensure the Unarketing team Bnember improve the paper's profile on campus tional activities. general editorial 1 leatures editorial Assistant | Jpssistant The editorial assistant ipA The features editorial assis-would assist the managing | tant would have similar du-editor with the ^ »»J* ties as the general final edit of the editorial assis-paper and would Jjlr tant but would also help with the ^ specialise in the general day-to-day features section of the running of the paper, v A v-' paper. i, ^ A... J .r Graphics & Design: Laiira Parfitt FEATURESiPo/irics I2^eaverl9 January 2007 FEATURES In this section: Politics/Society/Business thebeaver.features@lse.ac.uk Somali All imti politf H*of wcmin^lass? Cnmin Wori^rs tion tims? Eyes to the Left WilliaiTLS + Whilst most people were welcoming in 2007 and the opportunity to once again create a fresh start at the beginning of a new year, the details of Saddam Hussein's hanging were emerging. From the possibility that the snatched videos and sound clips were taken and leaked out by Iraqi officials, to the abuse shouted at Saddam as he was hung from the gallows, we have seen the ever present danger with capital punishment and how ironically Saddam's death in this manner could backfire on the Iraqi and coalition forces. It's not that Saddam was the kind of person to keep around. Richard Dawkins seems to think that his brain may have come in use for studying what makes dictators tick - a slightly silly idea from an othenvise sane and rational man. At no point is it possible to compare the killing of Saddam with the many acts of death and torture he sanctioned whilst in power - there is simply no comparison between the sheer destruction and disregard for human life that Saddam showed to the Iraqi people and with that of his own death. We must question whether the sanctioning of the death penalty was the correct way to attempt to end this chapter in the history of the Middle East. The images of Saddam's death are damaging to the Iraqi government's credibility with the Sunni Arabs who may view this as an example of retaliation by the Shia community making the Shia-led government's task even harder. lyrants do not deserve our sympathy. In the case of Hitler we never had to worry about what to do with him once captured as he did the job for us when he committed suicide. The Chilean dictator General Augusto Pinochet was allowed to die peacefully of natural causes outside of custody. Would we have gained any more satisfaction if both of these evil men had been executed by our hands? There is no question over their guilt of crimes against humanity, there is no question over whether they should be pimished by society. The death penalty can never be justified by any society whether it is to punish a murderer or a tyrant. It achieves so little other than to belittle the guilty party and, more often than not, humanise them. It brings no sense of ending to crimes perpetrated and advances humans in no sense whatsoever. The consensus across the globe is quickly developing against the death penalty. In the US over the past thirty years, there have been 123 cases of innocent inmates being reprived from death row. The neo-cons and religious right wingers of the US have managed to keep its use flowing, but there are increasingly those fighting against its use in the world's supposedly most advanced nation and our only super-power. Florida Governor Jeb Bush and his brother before him over in Texas are particular advocates of its usage. In principle and in practice the UK is against the death penalty. However, the government has so far failed to state that the use of hanging in this case or indeed ANY case should deserve-horror Margaret Beckett declares that we are against the death penalty in principle but we are in fact fine with the actual death of Saddam. If we do not act on principle in a matter of life and death when will we? I do not doubt that condemning the death of Saddam is a difficult thing to do for the government in light of this particular prisoners track record, but condemning the use of the death penalty should be very easy indeed. Principle needs to play a bigger part in politics. We have stripped away the founding ideologies and principles of politics and have been left with a loose set of promises and personality politics amongst our main political parties. The cynicism directed towards politics is quite deserved when governments fail to chose the right course of action. I praise John Prescott, who is much maligned in the press for his frequent jumbling of the English language, but could not have been any clearer when stating that all those involved in the hanging "should be ashamed of themselves".! =Editors^ Blog In the very first Editor's Blog of 2007, it is time for a brief look back at the last year and ahead to this one to see if British politics is likely to get remotely exciting. Not that you need reminding but 2006 saw, amongst other things; the Cameron honeymoon period draw to a close, Charles Kennedy resign his leadership of the Liberal Democrats, Blair announce his departure, the loans-for-honours scandal. Sir Menzies Campbell take the party reigns, and who could forget Mark Oaten and Lembit Opik both ensuring that Westminster never becomes too dull. Two things finally became clear to our politicians which the general public have known for certain, for quite some time. Firstly that global warming should be at the centre of the current political agenda (Mr. Cameron, Gore and Stem deserve much of the credit here). Secondly as politicians tend to be much more interested in themselves than anyone else by the end of 2007, it is almost certain that each of the three main parties will have had leadership contests and done plenty of soul searching in the process ignoring the electorate and focusing on party squabbles. It is traditional at this point in the new year for commentators to make their predictions as to which major issues will be at the top of the agenda for the next twelve months. It is also worth nothing that current events usually bump most of these issues from the top spots of public concern. After all 2006 was meant to be about, amongst other things. Trident and pensions but ended up with extensive (or endless, take your pick) discussions about wearing the veil or funding of political parties. It would be wonderful, in a liberal and civilized democracy such as ours, to believe that the big issues of 2007 will be funding of the army. Lords reform and debates on taxation (both council tax and inheritance tax were flagged up as 2006 wound down). However 2007 looks set to be another year of navel-gazing because this May will see local elections in England, Scotland and Wales and shortly before, or shortly after; this country will see a new Prime Minister. What is the likelihood that this is going to lead political fireworks? Almost none. Theoretically the certainty that we will see a new face in No.10 for the first time in a decade should stir up some excitement however, regrettably, much of the news between now and some non-specific date May-June writes itself. Those of you who don't want to hear the news for the next six to eight months look away now. Blair's political obituary will start to be written in the coming weeks and any bold policy moves in the next few months will be seized upon as his attempt to secure his 'legacy' whilst Mr. Brown will flatten any attempt by Dr. John Reid to steal his promised crown. The new cabinet will see Brownites favoured and Blairties snubbed with the notable exceptions of the few bright young things (particularly the Millibands and a Benn) designed to rival a still youthful and still smug, Cameron. Footage of Gordon Brown entering Downing Street and a 10 year old image of Blair doing just the same will be repeatedly shown almost as often as we will hear "renewal in office" from the former Chancellor's lips. Sorry to ruin the surprise. Issues of real importance are likely to be buried in the weeks long cool-down period of one premiership and the warm up period of another. There is of course always the possibility that "events, dear boy, events" will ensure some fireworks in 2007. Only a few weeks ago Hazel Blears (aka the Poison Dwarf) started a flurry of rumours when she suggested to party activists that an election could be "less than six months away."The idea is that Brown, after having been elected leader of the party and consequently PM would call an election almost immediately to validate his position. Such an outcome was dismissed towards the end of last year as most commentators assumed that having waited so long for the key's to No.lO Brown would be unlikely to take the gamble. However the idea may be back on the agenda particularly since there has been growing disquiet amongst sections of the media, who question the legitimacy of the next prime minister being picked by the trade unions. Nevertheless the plan has the support of Ken Livingstone (not that this means a great deal) and both Cameron and Ming Campbell have been making serious public statements about the possibility. Although much of the news for the next few months seems wrapped up, already there is at least some chance of a decent scrap before then. Not that such predictability is a bad thing per se in fact it may just be an example of a stable constitution.. .however it does seem that, in Westminster at least, 2007 coidd be veiy dull. ¦ ANTED Features Editorial Assistant Politics Sub-Editor Business & Law Sub-Editor Society Sub-Editor Apply to: TheBeaver.FeatMres@lse.ac.uk 'W»Nff(TrSF I 'i 1 ') Labour Leadership Contest; Hang on a Minute! The Right Approach OSay Can You See...what a great cousin we have in America. During the holidays, I was back in Washington DC for a much needed break and to see some old friends. But being back in America did something else: it renewed my confidence in the principles of liberal democratic capitalism in the conservative tradition. Just like every other democracy, everyone knows that America has its problems. The root of this problem was most accurately described by Churchill; the definitive Great Briton: "It had been said that democracy is the worst form of Government except all the other forms that have been tried from time to time." America is human (despite what the French think) and humans make mistakes. None more so than the Democrats. It pains me to say there are more radical Democrats in Washington now due to the failure of the Republican party to maintain the confidence of the American public. I had the misfortune to be cornered by some of them, they expounded their verses arguing for what can only be described as a state-controlled Utopia. No amount of dreaming will escape the fact that Utopia does not exist, other than in Robert Moore's great work of fiction. Subscribers to this ever-elusive idea simply fail to recognise man's fallen nature. One only needs to look to works like Huxley's 'Brave New World' or Orwell's '1984' to see it is not long before the fraud of Utopia is exposed as a dystopia. If only the bottomless depravity of mankind was confined to the literary world. Unfortunately, history tells us another story. Hitler, Stalin, Pol Pot. My view of the recent Congressional elections is that the American people chose to repudiate the Republican party - in terms of efficacy as an administration (national debt), integrity as an organisation (Foley-gate), and judgment in governorship (Iraq). It was not, as many would like to think, a repudiation of the principles of the Republican party. What principles am I talking about? In one word; freedom. And with freedom comes responsibility, which Republicans recognise and seek to encourage. Democrats do not have a monopoly on fighting poverty and social injustice. It is not question of whether to care for those in need but how best to; a belief that the state is not the best benefactor of welfare. It was Ronald Reagan in America who had the courage to allow the people to regain their economic freedom and to use their hard-earned dollars as they wished. He led American society in building a culture where people had the moral freedom to do what was right. But he led the world, along with Thatcher and Pope John Paul II in proclaiming and insisting that freedom be a right to all, recognising the intrinsic dignity of man, regardless of creed, colour, sex, politics or anything else. What's my point? America serves as the best reminder to British conservatives, that economic liberalism does work - a free market is usually a good market. Where it is not, let us be imaginative in our proposals, rather than the left's exclusive solution of taking tax-payer's money to feed the problem. More crucially, America's social conservativism as an abiding force in American political culture shows us that values can be protected from moral relativism - we only need to have the courage to recognise and annunciate the truth. If we don't create the structural conditions for a free society where the truth can be discovered and affirmed, we ought not to be surprised when people turn to the empty pursuits of drugs, crime and narcissism. So go to America and see some freedom in action. See people work for a living with dignity. Watch how they protect the innocence of their children from the worst the media can throw their way. Listen to them sing with civic pride and a humility to the price paid for their freedom. Pray with them as they abandon themselves to providence. And ask yourself, is there something we can learn from these guys? If + two III Contents tuesday the ninth of January, two thousand and seven Interview Milton Jones is funnier and more lively than Milton Friedman 25 issues of PartB We have been around for far too long Literature Michael Moore is being watched a lot NH2 Music ATP coverage, far too cool for us •C. Hi. ^ 0 n 0 0 ¦» " 0—p- 1 0 1 •51= ) II ~0~P—OCH, E OH OH Visual Arts The Turner Prize is a prize for art Travel Kisses from Glasgow involve foreheads Miftori 5 -- I S 'Si -S This week's cover bitch makes some funny in Covent Garden. Razor sharp one liners rain down from left field. Where: Funny Side, Covent Garden When: Friday 12 th Price: £10/£7 concessions rant comptroiler joshheller music comptroller samashton visual arts conriptroHer ctaisymitcheH-forster fiirr, comptroHer angustse literature comptroHer erinorozco JMUS Medieval prog folk-rock band who use a mix of modern and medieval instruments, such as the lute, bongos and the modern bass and electric guitars. They claim to believe in fairies and pixies. Live shows are legendary, but the music is stiU a bit rubbish. Where: The Water Rats When: Wednesday 10 th Price: £6 'lact Vaf-hti Stewart Lee performs his new solo show, "What Would Judas Do?" for a month. Iconoclastlcism seems likely from the man who wrote Jerry Springer: The Opera and once made Ang Lee very Anglee. Where: Bush Theatre From: Hiesday 9th Price: £15/£10 concessions Qumen, V^tiver ZTid Jyaoa MoUm Acoustic sets from the folk-blipper extraordinaire Adem and the woman who once went in a horse and cart to visit Donovan, before benefiting from the folk renaissance. Impeccably good neo-folk. Where: The Roundhouse When: Saturday 13th Price: £13.50 - £18.50 theatre comptroller mollytucker style comptroller abaosunsade travel comptroiler jesstcamcardle food & drinking comptroller kimmandeng comedy com.ptroller christinewhyte thebeaver.partb@lse.ac.uk rp0' Happy New Thing. This issue is about resolve and resolution. Kevin has undertaken to smoke more regularly and with more conviction, Daniel is too busy breaking last year's resolutions to create any new ones although he has resolved to run the marathon, but only at the point when human beings are digital. Quite frankly we are very lucky to be alive. We no longer care. On another, even more morose note, it is also PartB's twenty fifth issue. As spurious 'an event' as this is we have decided to celebrate the only thing in our lives we ever have any time to do. We burned a cake as we mourned the passing of our normal lives. Enjoy, Kwln Pony a Daniel B Yatas -F* + tuesday the ninth of January, two thousand and seven three JB new year's revolutions amberganison thinks that resolutions allow us to explore the magic of possibilit/ joshheller is nnanic and without possibilit/ Can you think of one New Year's resolution that concretely changed your life? I can't. I've never kept a single one beyond January. As a child, the pledge to be nice to my little brother lasted, oh, maybe two days (in a good year). Since then, gym memberships have gathered dust...useless exes have reappeared...lofty goals have languished on the to-do list...all despite my best intentions. But that's not really the point, is it? We don't make resolutions on New Year's Eve expecting to wake up the next morning bright shiny and new, profoundly better or happier or more fit than we were the previous night. Illusions of fairy grandmothers and instant transformations have gone the way of the Walkman. As adults, we know that real change takes vision, commitment and sustained discipline. And none of that belongs with the sort of celebratory conversation that should come between glasses of bubbly and the balloon drop. Anyway, why would you choose to make a big life change in the depth of winter, the day after you've probably pushed the boundaries of excess? No, we make resolutions for just one reason: to explore the magic of possibility. you're not already going to the gym three times a week or volunteering with the deserving charity of your choice, chances are nothing about cold, dark January is going to motivate you. It's never worked for me. Instead, I make fanciful resolutions - not serious plans or useful projects, not study schedules or fitness regimes. What's the thing you most want from this year? A great voyage? An exotic love affair? Your first tattoo? Me too -well, at least one of the above. Why shouldn't this be the year that brings the best adventures yet? Of course, fanciful resolutions are dangerous. What if, by some miracle or twist of fate, you get exactly what you want? What then, what next? It's much safer to make mundane resolutions that don't challenge the status quo...but that will probably leave 2007 looking much like every year before it. Bo-ring. So if you're still having trouble moving beyond good-intentioned vows to wake up half an hour earlier or to drink less (or more), here's a poem from e.e. cummings - an exhortation, really -for the new year: may my heart always be open to little birds who are the secrets of living whatever they sing is better than to Few traditions exist that are as horrible as New Year's resolutions. They're as pointless as a library in Australia and i as irritating as WebCameron. There are two kinds of resolution. The first are those never i kept, a futile exercise undertaken for no rea-son other than attempting to make yourself i feel better. These are irritating enough, but the second kind are even worse. Rarely has anything in the history of mankind been more infuriating than the resolution achieved. Yet before we get on to those kept, let us stay with those not. What an absolute waste of time. I resolve to join a bloody gym. The exercise resolutions are discussed, as families lie bloated from delicious roast dinners, often with a mouthful of chocolate. Stop lying to yourself and to me. Every year in January the gym is full of people who had one, maybe two big roast dinners and decided that's it, this year I'm getting fit. Yet by Februaiy the number of people in the gym is back to normal. The annual charges already extracted from their accounts, people make up excuses about how busy they are and fail again to keep their New Year's resolutions. It is not that getting fit is a bad thing, far from it, but it is not achieved by a New Year's resolution, it takes work all year round, not the first two weeks in January. Resolutions simply play right into the hands of advertisers. During the six-month build up to Christmas there is the vast amount of frequently pointless and for that reason annoying. Yet it is the New Year's resolutions that are kept, it is the people who keep them, that are the worst of all. If you know someone who keeps New Year's resolutions, break their teeth. These are the most putrid and foul people to walk the earth. They make stupid little "to do" lists with little boxes on, then actually tick them when they're finished and write "to done" in a different fucking colour. Their alarm clock is only ever set to a time that's exactly divisible by fifteen. They're tidy. They spell thanks with an x. Even as children their colouring books would have not a single stroke of crayon outside the lines. They iron socks. They have a list of books to read and know exactly which date they'll finish each one. They spout annoying phrases like, "the early bird catches the worm." No. No. The early bird is a dickhead. These are the people with huge numbers of New Year's resolutions and each year they stick to them. "The journey of self improvement has no final destination." They have quarterly sessions where they assess whether the targets for this year's resolutions have been met properly. In different coloured pens notes are neatly written down, "only power-walked six times a day - must improve." "Managed to increase fibre in diet by 1B% - well done extra maxi-special gold shining bloody star." So New Year's resolutions, to con- On December 31, the year isn't a mystery anymore. It's a fixed narrative with a resounding The End. If 2006 wasn't a banner year, it's an opportunity to turn the page and start over (if only thanks to an arbitrary calendar endorsed by a 16th century pope). If 2006 brought you a new direction or a new city or a new sweetheart, it's an opportunity to expand on that beginning, to see where it takes you. And that's where the resolutions come in. We don't want to believe that we have no control in how 2007 will unfold. Of course, some things we can't choose. John Lennon reminds us that "life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans." Something amazing and totally unexpected could happen this year...and so could something disappointing, even tragic. Any given year is a mixed bag. But somehow that uncertainty, for better or worse, is more palatable in the context of what we hope for. It's a silly thing, hope - just a little word, but one with immense power. Even cynics and realists, the honest ones, have a tiny kernel of hope left...or wish for one. And what better day to hope for something, anything, than the first day of a new year. That's why I've given up traditional resolutions, the kind you can discuss at a cocktail party with total strangers. If know and if men should not hear them men are old may my mind stroll about hungry and fearless and thirsty and supple and even if it's Sunday may i be wrong for whenever men are righ t they are not young and may myself do nothing usefully and love yourself so more than truly there's never been quite such a fool who could fail pulling all the sky over him with one smile With a bit of song, a lot of fearlessness and a small measure of luck. The End on December 31, 2007 will close a narrative richer and more exciting than any we can possibly imagine today. I hope so. Don't you? i food-porn plastered across all media, s Iceland even tries to make microwaveable ; frozen vegetables look delicious (they fail). ¦After a few wonderful dinners over the s Christmas period and some excellent choco-jlate, you're immediately made to feel i ashamed about putting on a bit of weight. I Get exercising fast! Lose ISlbs in 18 days! (Convinced that this is the year you will reach the ideal of Size 0 jeans you make a resolution to strive for it. Your chance of keeping is as likely as a refurbishment of St Peter's Basilica being sponsored by Durex. j There are the ridiculous social resolu-; tions. I will spend less time going out. I will spend more time going out. I will be nicer to people I don't know. As if you're social life ' and character will be changed by a drunken sentence. Resolutions stem from guilt. Feeling regret about how you're sometimes in a bad mood, how much or how little you !go out, you decide to alleviate your guilt with a meaningless solution requiring no actual effort. You have about as much chance of keeping it up as Denis Thatcher did. ^ So those are the pointless resolutions never kept, made to patch your guilt from the previous year. It may seem as if the ' above means that New Year's resolutions are ;bad only because they aren't kept. That , they're weak and pathetic and it is because Ireal change is hard and long that they i should be frowned upon. That is not the ¦case. It merely demonstrates that they're elude, are rubbish. If you don't keep them then you're an idiot for making them. Spend your New Year's day doing something productive that you will actually achieve. Instead of resolving to eat more boiled vegetables, slather some goose fat on the roast potatoes. Rather than promising to be nicer to people, argue with your brother a bit more aggressively. To those people who will keep their resolutions, to you train-wrecks of human beings, you must change. You are what is wrong with this planet. Your "proper" attitude and efficient hard work are the very worst thing about our culture. So instead of eating muesli, have some white bread for once. Get drunk on a TViesday afternoon and lie in until Wednesday evening. Most importantly, abandon all those bloody resolutions you made on New Year's day. 1^. + four tuesday the ninth of January, two thousand and seven tllBIIII partb talks to comedian milton Jones, about the stupidity of oudiences, thie state of contemporary british comedy and ripping off his children. "W re're just flailing around in the darkness here, it's kind of a metaphor for my career." We are standing in the pitch black darkness, somewhere around the back of Ealing Studios where Mitchell Jones is due onstage in about, oh, seven minutes. That's if he can find his way there. Someone has promised us that they'll find some lights, Milton was told the switches were 'outside' which kept us pawing at walls for a precious 3 minutes until we gave up, defeated and blind. Above us looms the dark shape of a fire escape and someone, hopefully Milton, talks quickly and fluently in the darkness. "I wanted to be an actor, it didn't really work out. I wasn't working very much, and standup is something you can do quite quickly if you're prepared to do it. It was interactive and that was the hardest thing with me, because I'd trained as an actor I found it very difficult to shake the fourth wall, but there's a hard cliff face to get up and once you get to a certain level there's a kind of plateau where you've conquered your own fear of things going wrong and a whole boost of confidence that comes from that." Milton Jones has done a fair bit of conquering in his 20 years as a comedian. Timeout, Sony and Perrier awards are tucked under his belt. The Times has called him 'the King of surreal one-liners', he is perhaps best known for his string of BBC Radio 4 shows, the sixth series of which is due to begin recording this spring. "What's nice about radio is that it provides a different audience, it was kids, it was old people, it was people driving home, which was quite nice but sometimes they'd turn up at a rough old night, somewhere like here or Jongleurs, an old man and two children, and 'er it's probably not what you'd like, I'd just leave if I were you'. I still quite like the idea of young people writing in, but it's usually children which can be quite disturbing, or old people with different coloured inks, writing rambling letters, 'I'm shocked and appalled' and it doesn't really make any sense at all, there are lots of people with too much time on their hands." Talking of too much time on your hands, you were a student, how was that? "I went to Middlesex poly, as it was years ago, to do drama, but I was living at home so I'm not sure it counts. However the thing about standup is that if you've never had a proper nine to five job it's quite easy to think of yourself as a student that gets drunk occasionally and says things, you're keeping crazy hours and mixing with students as well. But you have to work, and maybe have done some other work as well. Those guys that come straight from university to do standup, they have to talk about elves and pixies like Ross Noble because they've never been a civil servant, or been in the war, like me, so they have to have to create a fantasy world. I think students are different now though because when I was around alternative comedy was more alternative, but now, and perhaps I'm just an old fogey and can't see it, but there seems less to kick out against. It may just be that students are too busy paying back their loans to have the time to be active. Maybe there is a possibility for a new alternative comedy but right now I can't see it happening." If it were to happen, what might alternative comedy look like now? "Well, it's very difficult to say. Mainstream comedy has moved into the realms sketched out by the alternative comedians of the 1980s so are we all part of the establishment or is everyone alternative? There is an idea that we have, as a society, accepted the cult of the individual, we don't trust the government, we don't trust the journalists that write about the government so we don't trust anyone but ourselves and this may be a way to conceive of today's comedy." "And there is a sense in which the 80s didn't really deliver. Not many of the standups from that era are still on television, even fewer that have kept their politics. For all the rebellion a lot of it looks like fashion now. The fact that there are only about 6 women stand-ups on the comedy store books, out of 160 acts, I mean what happened there?" Do you ever have the urge to use your platform to rant and froth? "Yes. But it's normally at student gigs and it's normally things like 'sit down for goodness sake' or 'if that's your attitude' or 'who's stolen the mic?' and that kind of thing. But even in the mid-80s, with Ben Elton and co. they were always preaching to the converted, so it would be really interesting for a right wing comedian to get up, not that I'd agree with anything he said, but if he was really good, to see how well he would do." He pauses and looks thoughtful, "Perhaps in the current climate that might not be such an interesting phenomenon. I have this joke, about 'tricky isn't it when you're in a mosque, everyone's praying and you really enjoy leap-frog', right, okay, fine normally, but I dropped it for a bit. Recently I bought it back in gig in Essex or somewhere and everyone went 'YEEAAAHHH' and I thought, no you're probably doing that for the wrong reason, so I dropped it again." It's fair to say that you have quite a well maintained visual image, is that important to your act? "I have a saying, 'The thicker the crowd, the higher the hair', because they need a signpost that says 'oh, this blokes a bit mad'. And if you're in Romford and it's full of stag night, if come in as a slightly middle class bloke doing clever words you're in trouble. So if you go in looking like you're selling big issue and 'is a nutter' suddenly its far less threatening, even though they are the same gags. And it disguises the technique a little bit because if you think that someone's quite slow and not really with it you can get away with more... puns basically." Do you ever lose an audience so totally - the thicker the crowd the higher the hair guys that come straight from university to do standup, they have to tall< about elves and pixies perhaps you're a bit too middle-class, perhaps the hair isn't quite high enough - that they attack you? "Like any good comic I have plenty of stories of dying. I once did a corporate in Bedford for 700 barmen. It's a bit odd isn't it, on your night off getting free food and drink, isn't that what you do every night of the week? And someone shouted out 'we don't get free food every night of the week' so I said to them 'How come you're all so fat then?'. I thought that was alright, but I didn't realize quite how enormous she was. So she burst into tears. She waddled out with the rest of her table. Half the room followed. The remaining audience surrounded me afterwards, said go in and apologise or we'll do you over. The promoter didn't pay me my money and I had to run to the car. A great night out. Another one happened during a gig I was doing at Trades Union Conference years ago. And I used to do this gag 'I used to go out with a woman who was... (traces curvaceousness in the air with his hands) ...deformed'. And for some reason I forgot to do the gesture, and the whole room went cold, and there was no point in trying to explain it. 'What I meant., what I should., oh no..' and this old man started heckling me and again I got surrounded and yeah." "There are certain jokes that have got a top line, and if they're clever enough I'll do the rest of it. And vice versa, if audiences are clever enough they only need know the first line. Occasionally what I'll do, one I'll use early on tonight is 'I've just come back from Australia, where I learnt some aborigine words, like the word 'Boo' which means return, because when you throw an ordinary meringue...' But then what quite often I'll do is pick on someone in the front row and shout 'Boomerang'. Which is quite unfair, but what it does do is bring up the 20% of the audience that perhaps didn't get it." Like the joke on his Paramount slot, 'Did you know the pope really likes cats, apparently he's a cataholic'. "Did you see that on Youtube? I've been informed by children that that's up there. My kids try and sell me gags. They're getting older now and they realize there's money in it." And you realize their cheap labour. "Yes exactly, lOp that's the going rate. Not too expensive... or fair" How much of your set is written by your children? "Yes, well more than... they know. Occasionally they've given me good ideas which aren't fully formed so obviously I can't pay them 'big money' but definitely they have given me good ideas.." Talking of good ideas a light has come on and we stand there blinking. Milton Jones is playing at venues around London. His BBC Radio 4 Show 'The Very World of Milton Jones' airs later this year tuesday the ninth of January, two thousand and seven EU w ^ aes^ ¦ * > ^ s m ¦I » "^v ' • , 3 • • ' A- ¦• " i~KV',t ¦vis .''^•i'"V5--2:--^ •J^' Ws six tuesday the ninth of January, tw with Campbell 25,000,000 years ago in the Eastern African forests Proconsul, an early form of monkey, emerged 250,000 years ago Peking Man, an example of Homo Erectus 25,000 years ago 'Missing Link' between Peking Man and Modem Man celebrating ¦ la'-. ' ^ A - il- this is our cake, it caught fire, the the right picture is after it was or D thousand and seven Should the LSE SU ban smoking? intervievv(!d r'.®" 25 issues ago Pete and Natalie invent PartB. Natalie was crushed to death under the weight of her own genius, while Pete is living it up in rehab as the only penguin in an otter sanctuary Modem Day The pinnacle of thousands of years of human evolution w. rU*'' ! left picture is it when it's on fire 1 fire, we never ate it. In its 25 issues ParlB has often courted controversy. Contrai-y to reports these 2006 riots were caused not by Borat, but by a particularly offensive editorial photo. The people of Kazahkstan have since apologised to Borat for implicating him in their angi-y shouting. ? eight tuesday the ninth of January, two thousand and seven spot the moore iangordon joins the moore watch The Moore Watch is getting pretty dull. A visit to the website dedicated to "[Presenting] opposing views and facts to Michael Moore's public assumptions and assertions," delivers only yet another rebuttal of one of Michael's angry e-mails and some speculation on John Kerry's opinion of soldiers. It's about as dull as watching a Stop the War coalition march. Perhaps it is during this lull in Moore activity, when even his most rabid critics have decided to take a respite that we are in the best position to really evaluate what Michael Moore means to the western psyche. It's probably not the best way to sell a book, but that certainly hasn't stopped Emily Schultz There are many stories that could have been told about Michael Moore. We could have a creation myth of how such a proponent for redressing the wounds of any and all underrepresented minorities trod underfoot by the governance of the most powerful country in the world is bom at the centre of that very country. We could have the 'celeb-reality' story of an activist applying simple moral principles to larger and larger issues until he overreaches the scope of those principles in an epic polemic against his own government. Schultz chooses to take the middle ground between the lovers and the haters. We are introduced to Michael Moore as he often introduces himself: using Flint as a proxy. The decaying world of American automobile manufacturing becomes the arena for the immaculate conception of this liberal Zeitgeist and within a couple of pages Moore is already penning libellous plays at a catholic school and soon after that running for school board. As far as learning about Moore as an actual person this is about as far as we get. Don't pick up this book expecting any sort of personal anecdotes or deep insights from a man that publicly speaks only in imperatives; this is after all a completely independent MICHAEL biography. In the 200 pages that follow we learn about Michael Moore through his works, the response of his critics, and the experience of people that worked with him. Schultz's biography is far from perfect. At times it feels like a series of lengthened movie reviews; at other times it reads like a collection of mini-biogra- , phies. Similarly Schultz manages to maintain neutrality in terms of agreeing or disagreeing with Moore's political opinions but it is clear that she does enjoy Moore's films, leaving those that object to Moore on cinematographic grounds rather than political grounds a little nonplussed. And yet beyond these two flaws Schultz has assembled a readable, enjoyable and informative biography of a man who has always deliberately avoided providing any tangible biographical material beyond press clippings and movie, introductions. In contrast to the Michael Moore Watch, the Tad Moore Watch (pictured, right - www.tadmoorewatch.com) rolls on. I don't know what people expect this guy to do, but if he does it, by God, we are going to catch him. Interview with the Author: Emily Schultz Obviously writing a biography is a significant undertaking, why did you choose to devote your time to Mchael Moore's lite in particular? Quite by accident I had already followed the career of Michael Moore because of my interest in film and also the types of political and social questions Moore raises. I grew up in a very small town on the Canadian-American border where life revolved around the factory. Those factories are now largely closed down. I first saw Moore speak in 1995 in Detroit. His television series TV Nation had just wrapped up in North America. He was promoting his film Canadian Bacon, but it was also a fundraiser for Detroit's striking newspaper workers. But for the most part what drove me was journalistic curiosity and the fact that there were no balanced resources on Michael Moore only opinion. What role do you feel Michael Moore plays in the American political environment today? A fairly unique one. This is a filmmaker whose name is mentioned on the Senate floor. Whether you love Moore's work or hate it, that fact alone is fairly jaw-drop-ping. At the same time, what you have to realize about Moore is that he has been playing the same role for a very long time. The difference is that he has become more widely known. He has grown into the role of a famous filmmaker and author, but he has always acted as a kind of underdog/watchdog. How do you feel Moore compares to contemporaries such as Morgan Spurlock or Enrol Morris? There's no question in my mind that Morris is the superior filmmaker. The difference between Spurlock and Moore is 200 pounds and Moore's talent. Where do you go after a book like this? elist. Strangely, back to my career as a nov- lis After a long and tortuous journey from London we settled into our chalet, eating and opening the first of many beers before heading off to see our first band of the weekend. Upon arriving at the stage where Deerhoof were playing we were confronted with an almighty queue, which bayed and surged for a good 40 minutes before we were allowed in. After all the build up of queuing I found my mind distracted and it was difficult to concentrate on Deerhoof's jagged pop songs. However Greg Saunier's frantic drumming continues to impress. After a brief period in the arcade we return to see Bardo Pond take to the stage. Their drone infused stoner rock is incredibly compelling. The songs are dense with instrumentation and complex in structure with only a flute providing scraps of melody in the murk. I left before the end in order to catch the drone-folk duo Charalambides. I pushed my way to the front and grabbed a seat on the stage as their twin duelling guitars began to ring out from the PA. Their songs are loose and fluid jams, Christina's scratchy dissonant strumming intertwining with Tom's reverb soaked solos for what seems like a blissful eternity. Occasionally Christina would begin to sing, her haunting voice finding its way easily into the mix, lying broken amongst onslaught of guitars. Their music manages to astound at its sonic complexity and stir the heart with its fragile emotive core. Next to play were Fursaxa, whose looped instrument & ethereal vocals were enjoyable, yet never managed to rise above merely pleasant to affect the listener, or perhaps just this listener, in any meaningful manner. The night was rounded off with an excruciatingly loud set from New Zealand noise-rock legends the Dead C. The music began with waves of serrated sound emanating from their crude analogue noisemak-ers, themes gradually emerged as guitars and drums were added to the music, swelling and pulsating to viscous heights. The next morning brought ringing ears, pounding headaches and Wooden Wand, whose pleasant folk, filled with religious imagery and pretty harmonies, acted as the perfect hangover cure. Next under-ground legends Sun City Girls manage the rare feat of being tech-n i c a 1 1 y astounding, awfully dull, hilarious & jaw droppingly excellent all in the space of an hour. Gang of Four provided the weekends equivalent of light entertainment with their greatest hits set. Despite their age the band were still incredibly tight, their funky bass lines rubbing up against serrated guitar to magnificent effect. But the day obviously belonged to Sonic Youth. Having exorcised their noise demons playing in various other bands over the weekends SY treated us to a set of classics alongside a heft of jangly art- pop numbers from their latest album Rather Ripped. Of course Sonic Youth never play it straight up, most songs departing on lengthly noise jams; Thurston & Lee wrenching feedback from their guitars as Kim dances in a manner far sexier than any 40 year old mother should be capable of. Their set ends with a stunning version of 'Teenage Riot', Thurston & Lee physically battle with their guitars, and they exit the stage with their instruments a tangled mess on the floor. Sundays sees me reverting to childhood joy with a trip to the swimming pool. Afterwards we watch Alexander Tucker creating densely layered vocal drones and beautiful tone poems, now and again cutting the loops from the mix leaving just strummed guitar and melodic vocals; the juxtaposition was beautiful. Then Six Organs of Admittance provided one of the performances of the weekend. Chasney was rocking out with a drummer and a bassist, his acid fried solos proving Six Organs to be one of the most interesting and varied 'folk' acts out there. For the last song Sir Richard Bishop joined for some extended guitar duelling. Standing back to back with Chasney it seemed bizarrely sexual, their guitars sounding like lovers fighting. The weekend ended with a triumphant set from Simbumed Hand of the Man, who seemed to have incorporated half the bands playing into their voluminous line up. People in masks were waving large sticks, bizarre women were crouched twisting knobs on unknown instruments and a large man in drag and a red wig muttered poetic nonsense over the deranged wall of sound; a fitting end to an awesome weekend. omashton is blown owoy bv thurston moore's festival of sound more moore at all tomorrow's partis oc + tuesday the ninth of January, two thousand and seven nine top ten of two thousand and six angystse runs down his run down 1. United 93 This needs to be seen' in the.